Software Engineering Jokes

Software Engineering Jokes :)

A project manager, a computer programmer and a computer operator are driving down the road when the car they are in gets a flat tire. The three men try to solve the problem.
The project manager said: "Let's catch a cab and in ten minutes we'll reach our destination."
The computer programmer said: "We have here the driver's guide. I can easily replace the flat tire and continue our drive."
The computer operator said: "First of all, let's turn off the engine and turn it on again. Maybe it will fix the problem."
Suddenly a Microsoft software engineer passed by and said: "try to close all windows, get off the car, and then get in and try again.

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"Have you heard about the object-oriented way to become wealthy?"
- "No..."
- "Inheritance."

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The boy is smoking and leaving smoke rings into the air.
The girl gets irritated with the smoke and says to her lover: "Can't you see the warning written on the cigarettes packet, smoking is injurious to health!"
The boy replies back: "I am a programmer. We don't worry about warnings, we only worry about errors”.

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There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those that understand binary and those that don't.

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A programmer was walking along the beach when he found a frog. He said to him "If you kiss me I’ll become a beautiful princess”.
The programmer took the frog and keep it in his pocket,the frog said again,”If you kiss me,I’ll become a princess and be your girlfriend”
The programmer take it out of his pocket smiled at it and again put it back into pocket,the frog said again,”If you kiss me,I’ll become a princess and be your wife”
The programmer again take it out of his pocket smiled at it and again put it back into pocket,finally the frog said “Whats the matter why are you not kissing me?”
The programmer said,”I am a computer programmer,I don’t have time for girlfriend or a wife,but having a talking frog is cool”

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A programmer’s wife asked him,”Can you go to the shop and bring a loaf of bread and if they have eggs,bring six?”
He returns with seven loaves of bread.

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A programmer told his friend that he has a baby,his friend asked “if he is a boy or girl?”
Programmer replied “Yes”